Technology
- Dell 15‑inch touchscreen laptop running Ubuntu
- Power adapter
- 2 TB external backup drive + cable
- Spare phone + charger
- Boot/Reload USBs: “red pill” and “blue pill” OS sticks
- Northern Europe power adapter
Outdoor living
- Trail soup (four packs) & food tabs (generous stash)
- Electrolyte tablets
- Field water filter straws (2)
- 2 L collapsible bottle; collapsible bowl and cup (with sip lid)
- Camping spork and table knife
- Roll of quarters ($10) — laundromats, payphones, plot twists
- Compact camp shower & emergency poncho
- Spare underwear, T‑shirt, socks; two hair ties
- Large tarp (makes a fast tent); 350 lb rope + four 350 lb carabiners
- Multi‑tool hatchet: small axe, hammer surface, rope cutter, flint & steel, three nut drivers
- 100 ft orange paracord; waterproof matches; fire‑breather tube
- Multiple flint‑and‑steel sets (redundancy is a love language)
Emergency
- Compact first‑aid kit
- Crank/solar emergency radio:
- AM/FM/Weather with antenna
- Large flashlight
- Solar panel & hand crank
- Rechargeable batteries; USB output
Field tools
- Small tube of twine; tight roll of black duct tape
- Rite‑in‑the‑Rain pens (few) + pocket notebook
- Small Tasco binoculars; metal‑cased compass
- Milwaukee 6 ft tape measure
- Largest Swiss (with pouch) — long & short blades, file/rasp, fish scaler/ruler, scissors, pliers with wire‑cutters/stripper, Phillips, magnifier, large/small flatheads with bottle/can openers, two chisels, line hook, leather awl, corkscrew, jeweler’s driver, sewing pin, toothpick, ink pen, tweezers
- Fire‑starter cotton; compass with map‑ruler; aluminum foil; pencil; whistle (with storage); signal mirror; two mini sheets of Rite‑in‑the‑Rain; simple knot guide; two band‑aids; pocket survival guide; fishing kit
- Large Swiss Army knife — large/small blades, scissors, pliers with cutters/stripper, bit driver, large/small flatheads with bottle/can openers, leather awl, line hook, corkscrew, jeweler’s driver, tweezers, toothpick, slots for pen & sewing pin (currently missing)
- Victorinox SwissCard — small blade, small/large Phillips, small/large flatheads, magnifier, scissors, tweezers, ink pen, sewing pin, LED light
- Two hand‑powered chain saws
- Two metal “Monkey Tools” — letter opener, bottle opener ×2, nut driver (sizes), flatheads ×2, Phillips ×2, knife edges ×2, navigation aid, line cutter, saw, assorted mystery holes that will be perfect someday
- Two small multi‑tools; pocket knife sharpener (in box)
Outdoor guides
- Tiny Survival Guide (11×14 fold‑out) with magnifier
- Plastic card sets:
- Wayfinding
- Primitive cooking
- Knots
- Shelter building
- First aid
- Paracord
- Fire building
Why carry all this?
Comfort is borrowed; preparedness is owned.
This bag isn’t for the apocalypse — it’s for the day the trail is longer than the map, the power is out, or the campsite faucet is decorative. Also, quarter‑powered laundry is civilization.